~ Osho, Creativity: Unleashing the Forces Within
Why do you write?
I get asked this a lot, and it is both the easiest question in the world to answer, and the most difficult. The easy answer is simply because I love to write. The difficult answer is to explain why that’s so, and to try and figure out where that love of writing comes from. This is why the Greeks had their muses and other cultures had their Gods of poetry — because how else could they explain it?
“To be creative means to be in love with life. You can be creative only if you love life enough that you want to enhance its beauty, you want to bring a little more music to it, a little more poetry to it, a little more dance to it.” ~ Osho, Creativity: Unleashing the Forces Within
So, sometimes I read to figure out that answer — to look into the minds of other creative people in order to figure out how far they’ve philosophized and how far behind I am in finding my answer. The answer to “why do I write?” is many layered and at the core, the same as asking “what is the meaning of life?” Simple? Not at all. It’s like a diamond, where we see some facets and have some partial answers, but we can’t name that which is faceted in this simile. It is an undiscovered gem of knowledge, I guess.
“Life begins where fear ends.” ~ Osho
I spent a lot of time over the summer reading a few works by Osho, namely, “Intuition: Knowing Beyond Logic.” I had just started my apprenticeship, and the book seemed useful enough. After all, I do enjoy the occasional Zen writings I stumble across in my travels. I read through the book, adapting different mindsets as I went in to do tarot readings. Still, for what it’s worth, I was afraid of what would happen for that first “professional” reading I had to do — terrified that all that I knew would go out of the window, and that I wouldn’t be able to speak.
You know, kind of the same way I feel whenever I go to read my poems to a group of people. It was at that table, as I was reading what I saw in the cards that I realized that the reason I had this fear was the same as the public-speaking nerves. This is my creative expression, and I have always been afraid of what people would think of that. Because maybe writing a poem and sharing it shows a vulnerability of sorts. I write so I can move all this aside, and continue on without going crazy. I can close the cover of the notebooks and put it away and go on to class or work, and so on. If someone else reads it in the future, they don’t have my face to pair with these words that are…well, basically my soul, if we want to keep using that analogy.
In class, we are told we cannot write for ourselves. We have to keep our audience in mind as we scratch pen on paper. I have gotten better at reading my work aloud. Not much, probably, but better. I write. So this is part of the job description. Someone wise told me too that the nervousness never really goes away. We just get used to it. Maybe then, after it becomes so second nature, it’s not so much fear but a response to our own creative energy.
“Truth is not something outside to be discovered, it is something inside to be realized.” ~ Osho, The Buddha Said…: Meeting the Challenge of Life’s Difficulties